


15x03 Rewrite

by vangogh_hoe



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 15x03, Angry Dean Winchester, Angst, Apologies, Castiel finally sticks up for himself, Destiel - Freeform, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Castiel (Supernatural), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Season/Series 15, season 15 episode 03, soft boi hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:33:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26114221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vangogh_hoe/pseuds/vangogh_hoe
Summary: Rewrite of Dean and Castiel's argument in 15x03 with an alternate ending.I loved how the show depicted their fight and the purgatory make-up scene, but I just couldn't help myselfThis version has more feelings, though, so bring tissues
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 5
Kudos: 90





	15x03 Rewrite

“How’s Sam?” Castiel’s voice echoes through the room, causing Dean to clench his fist. 

“Not great.”

“I’m…sorry about Rowena.”

“You’re sorry?” Dean snapped. “Why didn’t you just stick to the damn plan?” 

“Belphegor was lying—“ 

“Belphegor was a demon!’

Cas grew defensive. “He was using us! He wanted to eat every last soul to take over hell, earth, everything!”

“Yeah, well we would’ve figured it out! After! With Rowena!”

“The plan changed, Dean. Something went wrong. You know this. Something always goes wrong—“ 

“Yeah and why does that something always seem to be you?” 

Dean’s words cut through Cas like a knife. His heart dropped to his stomach and all the air was knocked from his lungs. 

He pursed his lips, tears welling in his eyes but refusing to spill over. He looked to the ground and nodded slowly. 

“Okay.” Cas said in a barely-there voice. 

“Okay?” 

“I’m…dead to you, Dean. I’ve known it for a while now, felt it, but I dint want to believe it. But you’ve made it loud and clear.” Cas turned, deflated, and began to walk through the map room towards the stairs. 

“Where are you going?” Dean asked, voice still sharp. 

“Jack’s dead. Chuck’s gone. You and Sam have each other. I think it’s time for me to move on.”

Cas stopped in his tracks when Dean’s voice barked through the room. “What? You want me to stop you? Get down on my knees and beg you to stay, huh?” 

Cas snapped back towards Dean, nostrils flared. “I know my faults, Dean! All the times I’ve failed. All the people I’ve let down. The angels. My friends. Jack. Sam. You. I carry my guilt, my shame, with me every single day, and don’t think for one second that I don’t. I know that I’m not enough. That I’m not good. No matter how hard I try.

“I fell for you, Dean. I sacrificed everything for you. My family, my brothers and sisters, my place in heaven, my grace, everything! I’ve died for you! I’ve laid down my life to save yours. And I would do it again.” 

The fire died in Cas, leaving behind only sorrow. “All I’ve ever wanted in return was your trust. But you can’t even give me that. So, no. I don’t expect you to ask me to stay because I know that I am nothing to you.” 

Cas quietly climbed the stairs and left. 

The sound of the heavy metal door echoed in Dean’s ears. He was frozen in place. Rage still coursed through his veins but there was something else there too. Something he didn’t want to acknowledge. It was easier to ignore it. So that’s what he did. 

———————————————————————————————————————

Two weeks later, Cas was settled in a motel in Nebraska. He had just finished a hunt and was resting his eyes when he heard a tentative knock at the door. 

Grabbing his angel blade, he looked through the peephole. Standing on the other side of the door was Dean Winchester. 

He hesitated. Once again he felt the air pulled from his chest. 

“Com’on Cas. Just… Let me in.” Dean pleaded. He sounded dejected. Cas would’ve been concerned if he hadn’t been through this act before. 

He sighed and placed the knife on the table before opening the door. Because after all it was Dean and he was Cas. And God help him because he still couldn’t deny the righteous man. 

Dean said nothing, instead hesitantly stepping forward and carefully wrapping his arms around the angel. 

This hug was not like the embraces they’ve shared in the past. In the past, Dean would stand tall and almost defensive, giving Cas a strong pat on the back before letting go only after a second. This… This was different.

Dean’s shoulders were slumped like he had been hollowed out. He tucked himself down into Castiel like Cas was the only thing holding him up. He was vulnerable. 

“ ‘m sorry,” Dean whispered into Cas’ neck. 

“Dean…” 

“Yeah,” he said pulling himself away from the angel. He ran a hand down his face as he carefully sat on the end of the bed. “I know.”

Cas kept his spot by the door, which was now closed. He waited patiently for Dean to say something. 

“I should have stopped you.” Dean choked. “You’re my best friend, but I just let you go. Because that was easier than admitting that I was wrong.” Tears were falling from Dean’s eyes but he couldn’t find it in himself to care right now. He just needed Cas.   
“I don’t know why I get so angry. I just know it’s always been there. And when things go bad, it, it just comes out. And I cant— I can’t stop it. No matter how bad I want to… I just can’t stop it. And when you died, when you were in the empty, I—“ his voice broke. “I couldn’t take it. Not even Sammy could pull me back from that edge. So for you to say that you’re dead to me? Cas, I’m so sorry that I made you think that. I need you Cas. I always have. And not because of your powers, but because you give me a reason to get up in the morning. You’re everything to me Cas. And I’m sorry it took me ‘till now to say it. Cas I’m so sorry.” 

Dean ran his hands through his hair as he sucked in a shaky breath. His body was wracked with sobs and he couldn’t bring himself to look Castiel in the eyes, so he duked his head to the floor. 

His gaze was drawn up when Cas knelt down in front of him and grabbed his hands in his own. 

“Dean,” he said, silently commanding Dean to look at him. “I know you have had a hard life. Harder than most people. And the things you’ve seen, the things you’ve had to do— I understand the anger. But then you continually take it out on me with no regard for how much you hurt me in the process. At some point you have to take control of your life and stop being a victim of circumstance. You’re an adult. You know the root of you anger, your sadness. You can’t keep using it as an excuse to abuse the people you’re close to.”

Dean nodded, letting out silent sob. 

“That being said, I forgive you Dean. I want to move forward from this.”

Dean crashed forward into Castiel again, burying his face in his neck and breathing in deep. 

“I love you so much.” The confession came out so freely that it surpassed even Dean. “I’m sorry it took me so long to say it. But I do. I love you so much.” New tears poured from his eyes and he burrowed further into the angel. 

Cas had tears coming from his own eyes now as he hugged Dean back. They clung to each other like a castaway clings to a life raft. 

“Come home.”

Cas nodded, his cheek rubbing against Dean’s hair. “Always.” 

Dean pulled back just enough for him to lean up and connect their lips. 

The kiss was soft and gentle, but still held all the passion the two had for each other. 

Cas set a firm hand on Dean's chest, pushing him up the bed, but still not leaving his side. 

There was so much pent up emotions between them and they could feel it building and building as the kiss deepened, but underneath it, they were both exhausted. The kisses slowly faded out, neither of them wanting to go any further tonight, leaving them laying together on the bed, foreheads connected, eyes closed, breathing each other in. And for tonight, that was enough.

**Author's Note:**

> This concept had been on my mind since the episode first aired and I finally wrote it down! I hope you guys liked it!!!


End file.
